The One with the Slowest-Caused Traffic Jam in History

Traffic had come to a standstill, a bus screeched to a halt and several men jumped from a van to run into the street...something was causing all this chaos and Kalyn and I were just in time to catch the action! We maneuvered our way around taxis, trucks, and several gawking tourists and were absolutely SHOCKED to see what lay in the road... a Sloth moving ever so slowly across the road – at a pace closely resembling roadkill. I guess we were officially in the jungles of Costa Rica, where you are just as likely to run into a sloth or monkeys as a you are a household cat!

No, he didn't get run over, a local lady says the yellow is a distinguishing mark of his gender.

After Mom left Kalyn and I to our own devices, we devised a skeleton of a plan: head south toward Panama, Island hop, see the Panama Canal, and somehow make it back to Nicaragua in time for me to catch a flight home (a solid 24 hours before having to take my last two finals of college). The plan so far has landed us in the rasta-influnced surfing village of Puerto Veijo on the Caribbean coast of Costa Rica – nearly walking distance from Panama. We got in late, managed to talk a hostel owner into letting us pitch a tent on her porch for $4, and settled into a restless muggy night of sleep. We awoke with a determined plan to “see the sights” of Puerto Veijo, which basically translates to rent a cruiser bike (the most common form of transportation in these parts) and ride as far as the road would take us.  

We ran into the sloth within the first three miles of our ride. Giddy with the excitement of seeing such an exotic animal just chillin' on the road, we picked up the pace determined to find more adventures. Passing one giant resort and trendy restaurant after another, buildings eventually became more and more sparse as the jungle loomed with bigger and bigger trees, more exotic flora, and a noticeable increase in wildlife noise. We passed a dirt road Kalyn read a sign in Spanish that loosely translated meant, “Big Ass Tree”, so of course we had to go see it! We took our cruiser bikes along a rough dirt road for the better part of a mile, ducking to avoid MASSIVE spider webs reaching 3-4 feet in diameter and praying our bikes would handle the rocks without breaking, possibly leaving us stranded in the jungle miles from town! We reached a really big tree, and were about ready to ride on in search of what promised to be an even bigger tree when we heard the throaty barks of not-so-friendly dogs.

Angle doesn't do it justice,
 but this tree was MEGA

“I think this tree is big enough.” Kalyn stated, looking up the road toward the sound of the dogs.

“For sure, lets take pictures before the dogs find us!” I said, pulling out my camera to snap shots of what still amounts to one of the biggest trees i've ever seen in my life!

This wasn't even one of the big ones, it was just the only
one I was willing to get this close to!

We rode back to the main road and decided that with only a few hours of light left, it was time to head back for dinner. On our way back we passed several families of monkeys – the howler monkeys were hugely intimidating and their howls sounded through the jungle long after we passed them -how the locals sleep with these guys around is beyond me! Just before reaching town we pedaled out to the beach to experience our first dip in the Caribbean Ocean. The water was warm but the waves were huge so we opted to get our feet wet and call it good. Clamoring out of the sand, we rode across the street to a “Soda” which basically means ghetto cheap restaurant, often with really good food! We weren't disappointed as I scarfed down an incredible fish fillet and giallo pinto -rice and beans (the staple food of Central America).

Tomorrow we make the last push to Panama and hope to make it to the Bocas Islands where we will camp, hike, and swim ourselves silly before heading to the big city!

-Ash

Fun Fact: While writing this blog, I shared a table with several Rasta-men who were a few beers deep. Their language fluidly jumped between Jamacian-influenced English and Spanish depending on who joined the conversation. During the banter, a man received a video call from his son and after a hilarious 10 minute conversation between father and son (who must be a toddler), Dad gave his parting words:

“Stop your fighting, quit your crying, behave yourself, do your schoolwork, and treat your mother right or i'll whoop your ass. Oh, and score five goals tomorrow! One love for me and you boy!”...I think this guy could write a book on parenting!